


1.	Every day the sun comes up

by MarvelAims (aimzzz)



Category: Captain America (Movies), Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-18
Updated: 2017-01-18
Packaged: 2018-09-18 11:24:21
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,327
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9382535
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aimzzz/pseuds/MarvelAims
Summary: When Tony flew into the portal, he knew he was going to die, he did not need Steve to tell him that. He had accepted his fate, and was quite curious about the prospect of dying, and whether or not he would see his mother.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Enjoy

“Every day the sun comes up Tony, and every night it goes down again” Maria had once said to tony, combing her hair in the large mirror in the hall way. Tony hadn’t realised what his mother had meant, and hadn’t taken much notice. She was often spaced out, her eyes glazed over, her makeup half painted on her face, the only time she wasn’t was when Howard was around. Howard needed someone respectable and with her head screwed on, he needed the pretty trophy. Love had never existed for Howard and Maria, their relationship was set on fake smiles and tight grip, and because of this, not much love reached Tony. His mother loved him, in the way a drugged up mother could, by giving weird hugs that were stained with the vodka on her breath, and inspirational quotes that at this time in Tony’s life didn’t make much sense. Howard, was rarely seen, hidden away in his work shop, tinkering at machines that could cut through icebergs.

When Howard and Maria died, in that car crash, it was a media frenzy. The whole world in morning for the genius and his prisoner. In the end that was all she had become, a drugged prisoner, utterly trying to convince herself that she wasn’t trapped, she chose to stay there, in that cold empty house. She would call Tony when she was delirious, telling him that she wished she had done more, that she would have loved to be a better mother, that she loved him, that he was her son. That all of her life, instead of the pill bottles she orbited around, she wished she had been able to orbit around him, because he brought her hope. Tony hung up, shaking his head, muttering about the drugs becoming worse as she got older. That was the last time he would ever hear her voice. He got the words carved into Maria Stark’s tombstone, the same words she had said to him, when she was half off her head on whatever the craze was at the time. She was a sun, darkened by clouds, and eventually swallowed by the night. By the time the media had left, it was dark, the sun a distant memory but her white tombstone, still shown and the stars still glistened and all though Tony knew that this would be one of the worst times of his life, she had loved him and she was still there.

When he had been kidnapped by the ten rings, tony hadn’t seen the sky in months, and the words which his mother had said, had been long forgotten, as he was more focused on getting out, what this new thing in his chest would mean, and how he could save Yinsen. The night before his plan became realised, Yinsen spoke of home. “I took my children once, to observe the stars, they were going to be astronauts and explore the world” Yinsen said, staring into the fire, stirring the soup lightly. “Now they are gone, but in some ways they achieved their dreams, because now they are up there in the stars.” When Yinsen died and Tony had freed himself from the cave which he had been trapped in, he saw the sun for first time and he didn’t know whether to laugh or cry.

When Tony lit up Stark tower for the first time, it was the middle of the night and it was clear, there had never been more stars in the sky and the silence was deafening, and when the tower lit up he felt like he was one step closer to the people that he sometimes wished he could be with. It was a secret that he shared with no one, that he would visit his mother’s grave in the dark abyss of night and spill the struggles in his life, spoke about the tragedies, about hell, about anything that would flit through Tony’s brain.

When Tony flew into the portal, he knew he was going to die, he did not need Steve to tell him that. He had accepted his fate, and was quite curious about the prospect of dying, whether or not he would see his mother, whether Yinsen’s children would be dancing amongst the stars. The universe is beautiful, as he let the nuke go, watching it as it decimated the Chitauri. He closed his eyes at the thought of going to his true home, where the people who cared about him where. He toppled and just before the portal closed he flew through, back to earth. When he opened his eyes, to the faces of the avengers around him, and the sun, sky and clouds, he felt at peace, “maybe” he thought to himself “Maybe it’s not my turn yet”.

When Tony saw Bucky, he looked like his mother when she was high, his eyes glazed, and completely out of it, his hair a mess and Tony felt sympathy, Bucky looked overwhelmed and even though Tony was royally pissed by Steve breaking him out he understood why. People needed to be set free and released from the chains which trapped them. Tony understood everything, up till that Hydra base. He understood that general Ross had made wrong choices, and Tony knew that he shouldn’t have shoved the idea of the accords onto the Avengers with no time to prepare. However what Tony couldn’t understand was that breath-taking feeling of betrayal, the fact that Steve knew what Bucky had done and he hadn’t thought that Tony might want to know how his mother really died. All he could see was Bucky’s hand stained with red and so he lashed out and the fight which would later be dubbed as the ‘civil war’ begun.

When the war was over and Tony was left there, a broken arc reactor and a shield which he wanted to burn, he looked up and saw the sky and it was completely grey, nothing no sun, no mystical colours, just grey.

It was four months later when things started to change, the Avengers had returned, lies spun and political wars won, and now they were home, Bucky included. They all lived in the tower which Tony had created, in the hopes that the community feel would patch things up, but because of the sheer size of the tower it only made things more tense. Tony was sitting on the roof one day, right in the centre of the helicopter pad, looking at the stars, wondering what his mother would think of the man he had become. He stared and stared, a bottle of whiskey cradled in his arm, when he was disturbed by the faint sound of footsteps and he turned to see Bucky, his hair tied up and wearing the baggiest jumper in the world. The stain of Maria’s blood had completely faded from Tony’s mind, he had to accept that it wasn’t his fault, that Bucky didn’t chose this hell, it chose him.

“Can I join you?” He said as softly as possible, and Tony simply nodded, not really knowing what to say, but they sat in strangely comfortable silence as they watched the stars slowly fade and the sun began to rise. Tony, in a slight moment of confidence grabbed Bucky’s arm and said, just loudly enough for him to hear “Thank you for keeping me company today.” Bucky nodded, staring down at the warm hand wrapped around his arm. “It’s a hard day for you Tony, and I cannot take back what I did, so the least I can do is help you on the anniversary of her death doll.” Tony lifted Bucky’s arm around him and with tears in his eyes, looking at the sunrise, thought maybe this is what Maria meant. There are always highs, that were sometimes artificial, but the lows are so much worse, when you do not allow yourself to forgive and move on.

**Author's Note:**

> Let me know if you liked/ cried at this, because I got weepy writing it.


End file.
